Thursday, January 12, 2006

Last night Patrick and I were laying in bed and he out of nowhere asks me, "what do you think Joey will be like?". I had no clue how to answer, I don't know if he meant his down syndrome or just as a baby. I answered as a baby, I said, "a happy baby". I started to choke back tears, it hit me then and there that I'm going to be a mom in less than 3 months! I'm not upset about him having down syndrome or even nervous about the DS, I'm just nervous about being a mom. I've had this life growing in me for over 6 months now. It's really starting to hit me that my life is never going to be the same... it's going to be better. Patrick once asked me what I wanted to do or be after we got married, the only thing I could truely think of was a mom. I've always wanted to be like my mom and just stay home and raise my children. Now my wish is coming true! I have so many different emotions and feelings going through my body right now- happy, scared, nervous, excited... I could go on and on.

There are so many more things I need to do to prepare for Joey's arrival. Set up our birthing classes, get a tour of Yale's Maternity Center, take pre-baptism classes at church, find a pediatrican that has experience with Down Syndrome, and my favorite... fix up his nursery!!!!!!!! At times I feel so over whelmed not knowing if I'm missing something that I need to do. I've even gone as far as looking online for a list to look off of for stuff to pack when I go to the hospital!

I better go before I drive myself even more crazy thinking of all the things I still need to prepare for, time to do laundry!

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